Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I call Bullshit.

This is why I don't watch prime time TV.

I happened to be in the same room as tonight's episode of CBS' "The Mentalist", which, from what I can tell, is a permutation of the police/investigation genre with a snarky asshat as the main character. Said asshat uses a combination of Sherlockian observation and pop psychology and apparently always gets his criminal.

This episode (whose title was "Red Rum") had one of those plots that network writers grab out of their trash bin five minutes before the deadline...you know, the ones that take a minority, religion, or obscure subject and represent it as exactly what they think their midwestern, white, Christian family audience believes it is. This time they did it with Wicca.

The rough plot is this: Football player found dead with a small amount of evidence that suggests an occult connection. Police interview the parents, who immediately bring up "that witch", and point the investigators to a "witch" who apparently lives in the neighborhood and has accused said football player of killing her cat. The title character and his unprofessional, uninformed partners go to this house and find a pentacle on the door-step as well as a goat decoration by the door. It is explained to the audience that this is a mark of devil-worship. As no one answers the door bell, the investigators go question the football coach and search the locker room. They find, in the deceased's locker, a shirt with blood on it. They go to try the "witch's" house again, and break in with the assurance that a search warrant is "on the way". The owner is in residence, and welcomes them in. When asked about not answering the door, she says that she would have been at a disadvantage that way. She proceeds to explain that she did lay a curse on the football player in revenge for him killing her cat. She knew of the football player's death before the police did because she had her apprentices (of whom she is "High Priestess")looking for herbs in those woods that day, and she didn't tell the police because she believes that he'll just return to the earth, and there is no helping him now. She also says that he was an evil man. She liberally uses the word "cowen". Eventually it falls out that the football player's younger brother is an apprentice of the "witch's", and the police break into the "witch's" house in time to interrupt a cleansing ritual involving blood and lots of Latin chanting for effect. They bring in the "witch" and the brother, who was the object of the cleansing ritual. The witch curses one of the investigators (who is made fun of for the rest of the show for being superstitious), but then tells them about the brother and how he came to her willingly, curious, and is happy with her brand of witchcraft. For his part, the brother says he feels safe with the witch. This leads the main character to leap to the conclusion that the father is abusive and killed his son, and he's right.

No further mention of the cat.

This "witch" did lots of things that practitioners of Wicca (of whom she claims to be one) don't, including cursing on a whim, not reporting discovery of a corpse (that's really just stupid), invoking her Goddess as protection from police interrogators, claiming that she is the only witch in Los Angeles, conducting her rite in Latin using her blood-covered (supposed) athame like a wand...et cetera. There is one sequence, as they break in on the cleansing ceremony, which is shot in such a way as to suggest that the brother is going to be ritually sacrificed. Gardinerian? A little maybe, but I think it's more laziness on the part of the writers. Laziness and irresponsibility in promoting a damaging stereotype.

The "witch" character is, of course, damaged goods (because no one sane comes to Wicca), having never known her father and seen her mother murdered. She's a college drop-out and has been jailed fro petty theft before. Of course. The actress (Azura Skye)plays her creepy as all get-out, of course.

My favorite quote: "Why would you feel safe at a witch's house? If your father is abusing you."

*sigh*

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know. I know. This episode made CHARMED and THE CRAFT look like masterpieces.

Story Boyle said...

That is even worse than I thought. How in all the hells can they get away with this kind of defamation? "Why would you feel safe at a witch's house?" Maybe the Witch was a spiffy person who gardens and makes a good chocolate mousse? Not someone who acts like a creepy space cadet. I can't even form a more coherent critique right now. Argh. Why does Wicca on any kind of television program, heck, even in the news, always get made out to be some kind of loony blood cult?